Loss and Life: Reflecting

Yesterday a beloved professor of mine passed away from his cancer.  We all knew it could happen, but all the same, the news hit me like a truck.  All the stupid shit I had been anxious about that day seemed so trivial all of the sudden.  I’m worrying about an awkward thing I said in a conversation or a bad memory from past and what does any of it actually matter.  These individual moments won’t be remembered someday and the feelings associated with them will eventually seem fleeting.  What is a moment of anxiousness for the lasting memory one may get in return for enduring it.  Human life speeds by.  Compared to flow of life as whole it seems like the blink of an eye.  I want to take my time; I want to take risks.  I don’t want anxiety to hold me back and snag me on all the little things.

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